it's been a while...

13 april 2008



wow. it's been a little over three months since i last posted here... i guess i was a bit preoccupied about updating my myspace blog... but anyway...


usually when i update my blogger, um, blog, i'd just ramble on and on about different musings i'd have on my idle times, ramble about different excitements i've just experienced, and most of the time, i'd just rant about what sucks in my life.


this one would be one of those: ranting about what sucks in my life.


*sigh* ideally, it's not supposed to be this way, you know? what messed up person would rather confide in an electronic medium, to be read by anyone who may happen to stumble upon this site, than confide in other living, breathing, human beings? yeah huh. i think i just dissed everybody who owns a blog. i guess it's not my fault that nobody wants to listen to us, to me.


anyway, like i said, this is a ranting entry, and here's what i want to rant about: my mom. simple as that. i don't know if she's just old or what but it's downright impossible to reason with her now. utterly impossible. i don't know how people at work do it, but it's going to be a freaking warzone if you ever try to reason with her. i swear, if she just wasn't my mother...


take what happened these past two weeks for example. she'd get really, really mad at me (to the point of actually shouting at me in a mall, for crying out loud) just because i haven't bought an outfit to this stupid dance number thing that they're going to do for the company anniversary. yep. she's blown up on me just because of a stupid outfit for a stupid dance for a stupid company. in the first place I WASN'T EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE IN IT! and then she goes and busts her knee and expects me to take her place to that stupid sonofa***** dance number for that stupid sonofa***** company. i didn't want anything to do with that, with any of that. but, trying to be the good daughter that i supposedly am to do a request by my oh so great mother, and that she absolutely gave me no choice anyway, i gave in. okay. i was going to do the stupid dance. then she drags me to go shopping for an outfit that i still have no idea what it's supposed to be or what color it should be in, since i haven't actually seen all the outfits that the other participants are going to wear. and since i'd just be using it for only ONE time, she drags me to all these designer boutiques, which, i must add, are pretty darn expensive. all for an outfit that i'd pretty much wear for only a few hours (even minutes) and then forget that it ever exists in my closet.


and then she goes and says she doesn't understand me. i mean, COME ON!!!


it's me (and a whole bunch other people) that always gets stuck between a rock and a hard place everytime she'd just decide that she'd have one of her furious spells. nobody ever knows where they'd place themselves with her. sala sa lamig, sala sa init, as the saying in tagalog goes. it's like you're ALWAYS wrong... it's always your fault.


like i said, this sucks, big time.


way bigger problem: she won't believe a thing i'd say. she'd rather believe other people than believe me. really. would you believe that? i'm literally shaking my head as i type this, since images of instances before come flooding back at this instance.


she'll always believe that it's my fault. i'm telling (well, writing) you, if there would be a third world war, i'm sure she'll blame me for causing it.


is the whole world against me now? my internet explorer decided not to respond properly on me a while ago while i was typing... darn.


now if only my mom could read this, but it would take a miracle (and even two more world wars) for her to actually learn to use a computer and the internet. her excuse: she's too old... yeah, right. nobody's to old to learn new stuff (i don't believe that shit that you can't teach an old dog new tricks... bah)...


i need a job, badly. i need to get far away from here, start a new life, where i could be me. heaven help me...